Question 1

Taoism views sexuality as a path to physical health and spiritual enlightenment, offering practical techniques for intimacy and promoting balance between masculine and feminine forces.

Accepted Answer

Taoism, an ancient Chinese philosophy, provides deep understanding into the realms of love, sex, and the balance of Yin and Yang. According to Taoist beliefs, a healthy approach to sexuality can be a solution to many personal and societal issues. Taoism encourages the skillful pursuit of earthly pleasures as a route to both physical health and spiritual enlightenment. This is a departure from some philosophies that shun desire, as Taoism sees sexuality as a door to bliss and unity with the Universe.

Practical techniques for improving intimacy and extending the pleasure of lovemaking are offered by Taoist sexual teachings. These methods enable partners to feed both their bodies and souls through the dynamic exchange of Yin and Yang energies. With kindness, understanding, and skill, lovers can attain unprecedented levels of mutual satisfaction. By balancing masculine and feminine forces, Taoist sexuality presents a comprehensive approach to wellbeing and spiritual enlightenment.

The ancient Taoists acknowledged sexuality as a significant source of life and joy. Their wisdom on nurturing satisfying relationships and sacred sexuality is more pertinent today than ever before. If these teachings are fully embraced, they have the potential to resolve internal struggles, mend the divide between women and men, and foster more love in our world.

Question 2

The Taoist philosophy, Tao of Loving, promotes the regulation of male ejaculation, multiple orgasms, and female satisfaction to enhance intimacy, health, and longevity.

Accepted Answer

In ancient China, the Taoist philosophy offered a unique perspective on love and sex. It was seen as a natural and beneficial aspect of life, crucial for maintaining good health and promoting longevity. This philosophy, known as the Tao of Loving, was developed over centuries of careful observation and stressed the importance of harmony between partners.

One of the key principles of this philosophy was the idea that men should not view ejaculation as the only source of pleasure. Instead, they were encouraged to learn how to regulate it. The Taoists believed in the concept of multiple male orgasms without ejaculation as a way to enhance intimacy and allow for more frequent lovemaking sessions. This approach prevented men from becoming exhausted and ensured greater satisfaction for women.

The Taoists also believed that controlling ejaculation was essential for conserving a man's essence and maintaining his vigor. The ultimate goal was for partners to achieve a state of Yin-Yang harmony through prolonged, ecstatic union.

Interestingly, modern sex research has confirmed the validity of many Taoist practices. For instance, the practice of edging, which involves bringing oneself close to orgasm and then backing off to prolong pleasure, aligns with the Taoist principle of ejaculatory control. The emphasis on female satisfaction is another aspect that modern research supports.

The wisdom of the Tao of Loving offers timeless guidance for nurturing loving relationships. It presents a poetic view of intimacy that is sensual, joyful, and deeply nourishing. This ancient philosophy encourages us to view love and sex not just as physical acts, but as profound experiences that can enhance our overall well-being and life satisfaction.

Question 3

The Tao of Loving, an ancient Chinese philosophy, promotes sexual liberation through controlled ejaculation, exploration of pleasure beyond ejaculation, and prioritizing female satisfaction, linking mental well-being with sexual harmony.

Accepted Answer

The Tao of Loving, an ancient Chinese philosophy, is built on three fundamental principles. Firstly, it suggests that men should control their ejaculation based on their age and health. This allows them to engage in lovemaking as frequently as they wish without draining their energy. Secondly, it proposes that the peak of pleasure for a man isn't necessarily ejaculation. Once a man realizes this, he can explore and enjoy even more intense sensations during lovemaking, which in turn helps him manage ejaculation. The third principle underscores the significance of satisfying the woman, a notion that modern sex researchers like Kinsey also emphasize.

These principles paved the way for remarkable sexual liberation in ancient China. Women were not just participants, but also masters and advisors of the Tao of Loving to the Emperor. Their dialogues were filled with delightful, candid attitudes, expressed through poetic phrases like "jade gate" and "jade stem." The importance of lovemaking was such that doctors meticulously studied women's responses during intercourse. However, when Western writers tried to interpret the Tao of Loving, they brought their own cultural biases, leading to some misconceptions. As attitudes evolve, we are now in a position to fully understand and appreciate this ancient philosophy that links mental well-being with sexual harmony.

Question 4

Balancing Yin and Yang energies through ejaculation control can enhance lovemaking, leading to more satisfying experiences and overall health benefits.

Accepted Answer

Yang and Yin represent male and female sexual energies, respectively. These energies have unique characteristics that, when balanced during lovemaking, can create a harmonious experience. Men typically become aroused quickly and their arousal also subsides quickly. On the other hand, women take a bit more time to get excited and also require more time to reach satisfaction.

One way to ensure that both partners are satisfied is through ejaculation control. This technique allows a man to extend the duration of lovemaking until his partner is fully satisfied. For young men who are just learning this technique, it's important to start slowly and with a patient partner. Techniques such as shallow thrusting and the "locking method", which involves withdrawing the penis when excitement levels rise, can be very helpful. With time and practice, a man can gain better control over his ejaculation, leading to a more pleasurable experience for his partner.

As men age, it's recommended that they engage in lovemaking frequently, but limit the frequency of ejaculation. For men over 50, ejaculating once or twice a week is considered optimal. This balance helps to prevent fatigue and maintain energy levels.

Lovemaking, when done right, can harmonize Yin and Yang energies, leading to health benefits even without ejaculation. However, mastering ejaculation control is not an overnight process. It requires patience and practice. But once achieved, it allows men to separate the act of lovemaking from ejaculation, leading to more frequent and satisfying sexual experiences. Ultimately, gaining control over ejaculation can lead to a deeper sense of joy and a poetic expression of love.

Question 5

Ancient Chinese Taoist scholars, such as Li T'ung Hsuan and Sun S'su-Mo, studied and promoted varied and prolonged sexual techniques, emphasizing the importance of friction, rhythm, and moderation for sexual satisfaction and longevity.

Accepted Answer

In ancient China, a renowned physician named Li T'ung Hsuan identified six distinct styles of penile thrusting. These styles, as he detailed, include a back and forth sawing motion, an up and down thrusting, a pestle-like pounding, a left and right hammering, slow short thrusts, and heavy grinding. Li T'ung Hsuan, along with other Taoist scholars, dedicated significant time to studying these techniques. They believed that the right amount of friction was crucial in generating the "electricity" or the spark of sexual energy.

In contrast, Western scholars have often overlooked the significance of prolonged thrusting in Taoist sexual practices. However, a man who adheres to the principles of Tao can engage in sexual activity for over an hour, performing a thousand thrusts, thereby greatly satisfying his partner. Taoism introduces nine primary thrusting techniques, such as a warrior breaking ranks or a rat rushing into its hole. These techniques add a layer of complexity and prevent monotony. Taoism also suggests an ideal rhythm of nine shallow thrusts followed by one deep one. It further describes the vagina as having eight "valleys", each with unique names ranging from Lute String to North Pole, and advises men to vary their thrusting depths.

Sun S'su-Mo, another ancient Chinese physician, proposed that the ideal scenario would be a hundred sexual unions without ejaculation, but he acknowledged that most men could only achieve twenty-four such unions in a year. He recommended that the frequency of ejaculation should be determined by a man's age. He cautioned against complete sexual abstinence for non-elderly men, stating that men require women for longevity and suppressing sexual desire can be detrimental. However, he also noted that highly spiritual individuals could achieve sexual union without stirring their ching, or sexual energy. In essence, Taoism emphasizes sexual moderation, vigor, and variation.

Question 6

Variety and creativity in sexual positions, guided by open communication and experimentation, can enhance and invigorate a couple's love life.

Accepted Answer

Spicing up your love life calls for a dash of creativity and a willingness to experiment. This helps keep things fresh and exciting. The ancient Chinese wisdom in Tung Hsuan Tzu outlines four fundamental positions - Close Union, Unicorn Horn, Intimate Attachment, and Sunning Fish - along with twenty-six variations. However, there's no one-size-fits-all guide to the perfect positions for every couple. Since everyone's body is unique, each couple needs to find out what works best for them. This involves open communication and a readiness to venture into uncharted territory.

Consider the male superior position, which offers countless variations depending on how the man supports himself and holds the woman. Transitioning seamlessly to side-by-side and female superior positions can help maintain the intimate connection. The female superior position can be particularly empowering for shy women, giving them control over the pace and intensity of the action. The back entry position also offers a plethora of options. The trick here is not to merely mimic positions, but to improvise based on what feels good for both partners.

Just like how a varied diet keeps meal times interesting, regularly trying out new positions can keep the spark alive in your love life. In other words, variety in positioning is the spice that can transform ordinary lovemaking into an extraordinary experience.

Question 7

Passionate kissing is highly valued in Chinese culture as an intimate and crucial part of lovemaking, often associated with balancing yin and yang energies.

Accepted Answer

Passionate kissing is a significant aspect of lovemaking in Chinese culture, debunking the common misconception that the Chinese are not fond of it. However, they view it as an intensely private act, seldom performed in public. Historically, the Chinese have always placed great importance on erotic kissing, considering it a crucial element of sexual intimacy.

Ancient Taoist texts provide detailed descriptions of the essences produced from the lips, breasts, and genitals during lovemaking. These essences were thought to balance the yin and yang energies, the fundamental principles of Chinese philosophy. Deep kissing was highly valued, considered only second to intercourse itself in terms of intimacy.

Oral sex was also appreciated for its ability to stimulate arousal, though men were advised to control their ejaculation to prolong the experience. The lips and tongue, being voluntary muscles, were highly prized as they could be controlled unlike the genitals. This control allowed for extended periods of kissing, even when physically exhausted.

While most women find nipple kissing pleasurable, sensitivity varies from person to person. However, with patience and time, dormant nerve connections can be awakened to enhance sensitivity. Relaxing the muscles in the mouth can lead to fuller lip contact, enhancing the experience. Good hygiene and fresh breath are essential for a comfortable exchange of fluids during kissing.

Erotic kissing is a multisensory experience. The act of gently biting the lips, tongue, or ears can add an extra layer of excitement for many people. In conclusion, passionate kissing is seen by the Chinese as a vital component of satisfying lovemaking.

Question 8

The Tao of Loving, an ancient Chinese philosophy emphasizing mutual satisfaction in intimacy, lost its essence over time, shifting towards male pleasure, but modern sex research suggests its principles could restore relationship satisfaction.

Accepted Answer

In the early days, the ancient Chinese philosophy known as the Tao of Loving placed a strong emphasis on mutual satisfaction during intimate moments between a man and a woman. It was a philosophy that championed harmony and equality, considering the pleasure of a woman to be just as important as that of a man. Men were even given detailed advice on how to ensure a woman was fully satisfied.

However, as time passed, the original essence of the Tao of Loving was lost. As the status of women in Chinese society began to decline, the philosophy shifted its focus towards male pleasure. Some began to advocate for the idea of a man being intimate with multiple women in a single night. Others went as far as to depict women as adversaries or vampires, capable of draining a man's vital energy.

By the time the late imperial period rolled around, the Tao of Loving had all but vanished. This led to an increase in dissatisfaction and frustration within relationships. However, modern sex research has brought back to light the importance of female sexual fulfillment. The ancient wisdom of the Tao of Loving, with its focus on mutual respect and harmony, could potentially be the key to restoring satisfaction and pleasure in relationships.

Question 9

Temporary impotence is a manageable issue that can be overcome by relaxation, focusing on your partner's pleasure, and using techniques like soft entry, with penis size being less important than skill and connection.

Accepted Answer

A common issue that most men face at some point in their lives - temporary impotence. It's a situation where a man can't get an erection, and the fear of this happening often leads to more instances of impotence. It's a vicious cycle, but it's not a new problem. In fact, the ancient Chinese didn't see temporary impotence as a major issue.

One of their ancient advisors, Su Nu, had some advice on how to overcome this. His solution was simple - relax, focus on your partner's pleasure, and use techniques like soft entry. If you're wondering what soft entry is, it's a method where a man enters his partner with a flaccid penis, using finger manipulation to assist.

Moving on, another common concern among men is the size of their penis. But here's the reassurance - size doesn't matter as much as you think. What's more important is your skill and the connection you have with your partner.

There's also a mention of exercises from Wu Hsien that can help enlarge the penis. These exercises include meditation, breathing, massage, and gentle movements. They might sound unconventional, but they're in line with Taoist principles of focusing mental and physical energy.

In conclusion, temporary impotence is a common issue, but it's manageable. The key is to relax and focus on techniques that prioritize your partner's pleasure over your erection.

Question 10

Ancient Chinese Taoist philosophy linked longevity with healthy sexual practices, including controlled ejaculation, suggesting that regular sexual activity, when practiced correctly, benefits overall health and vitality.

Accepted Answer

In ancient China, it was widely believed that there was a significant connection between living a long life and practicing love in a healthy way. Historical evidence shows that emperors and wise men who adhered to the Tao of Loving, a philosophy of love, lived exceptionally long lives, some even beyond 100 years. On the other hand, those who ignored the principles of the Tao typically had shorter lifespans.

The secret to this longevity was the avoidance of forced ejaculation during sexual intercourse. The masters of Taoism instructed men on how to control their ejaculation even in the heat of passion. This practice allowed them to engage in lovemaking frequently without draining their life essence, also known as ching. Women, too, reaped the benefits of this practice as they were able to achieve full satisfaction.

However, as time passed, the understanding and practice of the Tao dwindled. In more recent times, some men, like Leautaud, faced difficulties in their later years as their sexual function altered. Yet, the work of Masters and Johnson, renowned sexologists, confirmed that older men can still be excellent lovers by shifting their focus from their own ejaculation to the satisfaction of their partners.

The Taoists had a deep understanding that a man's sexual potency and overall health are closely linked. Regular sexual activity not only exercises the body but also invigorates the spirit. With the right techniques, the process of aging doesn't have to reduce one's enjoyment of sex. This ancient wisdom on intimacy and longevity continues to offer valuable insights to the modern world.

Question 11

May-September relationships, despite societal biases, can offer unique advantages and promote good self-care, but require understanding and balance to preserve vitality.

Accepted Answer

A wise mentor once shared a tale to highlight how love can flourish between individuals of significantly different ages, challenging societal biases. In a world where longevity practices are common, a 65-year-old could be in robust health with many years ahead. Thus, a romantic relationship between a 65-year-old man and a 20-year-old woman would resemble a "May-September" romance rather than a "May-December" one.

Such May-September relationships can have their perks. An older man may take his time to become aroused, which aligns well with a younger woman's quick readiness. Her sustained readiness also benefits both parties. His excitement is fueled by her youthful allure and firmness, while she appreciates his confidence and tenderness borne out of experience.

On the other hand, relationships between older men and women may face more challenges. The woman's limited readiness requires more effort from the man. Energetic older men may lose interest in women their age but find renewed vigor with a younger woman. However, these couples with significant age differences often face societal biases, with relationships between older women and younger men facing particularly harsh criticism.

In truth, these relationships have their own unique advantages. The gentleness, experience, and nurturing nature of older women make them understanding of young men's challenges. Their less firm bodies are more accommodating for inexperienced young men. The young man's immediate and full arousal is exciting for older women.

Maintaining good personal hygiene is crucial in these relationships. Poor hygiene has been the downfall of many relationships. May-September relationships often promote good self-care habits. With more openness about sexuality, these relationships could become more common, providing companionship for lonely older women and shy younger men. However, older men need to be aware of the Tao of love's energy conservation principle. Without this understanding, they may exhaust themselves with a highly sexual young woman. The Tao is the perfect approach to achieve balance while preserving vitality.

Question 12

Ancient Taoist masters emphasized the importance of love, food, and exercise, including proper diaphragmatic breathing and Tai Chi, for health and longevity.

Accepted Answer

The wisdom of the ancient Taoist masters highlighted three main elements that are crucial for a man's life and longevity: love, food, and exercise. They believed that the way we breathe is a key aspect of our health and wellbeing. According to them, our breath, or chi, is more than just a means of getting oxygen into our bodies. It's a way to draw in the power of the universe. This idea is now being backed up by recent Western research, which suggests that our lungs do more than just exchange gases.

The Taoists emphasized the importance of proper diaphragmatic breathing, which involves breathing through the nose and fully expanding the diaphragm with each inhale and exhale. This type of breathing, they believed, should be a part of our daily routine to maintain good health.

In addition to breathing, the Taoists also developed exercises for every part of the body, including the eyes. They believed that these exercises could help maintain and even improve vision. This is because there's a connection between our breathing, blood circulation, and vision. However, many people only use about one-sixth of their lung capacity, which can limit the benefits of these exercises.

While lovemaking can provide some exercise, it's not enough on its own. Without additional exercise, people can develop common issues like backaches and problems with their spine.

One of the exercises developed by the Taoists is Tai Chi Chuan, a graceful dance that was originally designed for joyful exercise and disease prevention. Over time, it evolved into a martial art and a technique for self-defense. Tai Chi embodies the harmony of yin and yang, and its smooth sequences provide gentle yet effective exercise for all joints, making it suitable for total fitness at any age.

The final pillar of Taoist health is a proper diet. Overeating can be harmful, so moderation is key. Nutrition was a serious matter in ancient China and continues to be important today. By eating in moderation, people can have more time and energy for lovemaking, thus balancing the three pillars of Taoist health.

Question 13

"The Tao of Loving" guide teaches Eastern philosophies to cultivate a satisfying love life, emphasizing sensory engagement, effective communication, partner support, and ejaculation control for men, ultimately aiming for hormonal balance, relationship harmony, and improved health.

Accepted Answer

The Tao of Loving is a guide that teaches you how to cultivate a satisfying love life by embracing Eastern philosophies that are different from Western ones. It promotes the development of your senses, enhancing communication skills, finding a suitable partner, and mastering ejaculation control for men.

This guide underscores the importance of engaging all five senses during intimate moments, with a particular focus on smell and touch beyond just the sexual organs. Effective communication is key, and it involves avoiding criticism while offering praise in a gentle tone. Having a supportive partner is crucial in helping men gain control over ejaculation. This control allows men to engage in lovemaking multiple times without losing energy or feeling indifferent afterwards. Women, on the other hand, enjoy boundless affection and a natural form of birth control.

In the grand scheme of things, the Tao of Loving helps couples achieve a balance in their hormones and harmony in their relationship. This results in increased happiness, reduced stress, and improved health. The guide provides answers to common questions about Taoism, its medical validity, and its benefits over traditional lovemaking methods. It uses the metaphor of men "belonging" to fire and women to water. Essentially, the Tao provides practical tools to transform love into a flowing, meaningful experience for both partners.

Question 14

Accepted Answer

"The Tao of Love and Sex" by Jolan Chang is a comprehensive guide to understanding and practicing the ancient Chinese philosophy of Taoism in the context of love and sex. The book emphasizes the importance of sexual harmony, the role of women, and the significance of ejaculation control. It also highlights the importance of understanding and practicing the Tao of Loving, which involves the acceptance of different concepts from Western ones. The book provides a detailed explanation of the Taoist concepts of Yin and Yang, the importance of female satisfaction, and the significance of male orgasm. It also provides practical advice on how to achieve sexual harmony and satisfaction, and how to prolong a man's life through the practice of the Tao of Loving.

10 Specific Actions:

1. Understand and accept the three basic concepts of the Tao of Loving: the right interval of ejaculation, the importance of female satisfaction, and the idea that ejaculation is not the most ecstatic moment for a man.

2. Practice ejaculation control as per the guidelines provided in the book.

3. Emphasize on the importance of female satisfaction in your sexual relationships.

4. Learn to communicate effectively with your partner about your sexual needs and desires.

5. Practice the Taoist concept of Yin and Yang in your sexual relationships.

6. Understand and accept the Taoist concept of love, which involves physical harmony and spiritual harmony.

7. Practice the Taoist techniques of love-making as described in the book.

8. Incorporate the Taoist principles of diet, breathing exercises, and T'ai Chi Ch'uan into your daily routine.

9. Understand and accept the Taoist concept of male orgasm, which involves continuous and flowing love-making rather than occasional and explosive ejaculation.

10. Continually learn and practice the Tao of Loving to achieve sexual harmony and satisfaction, and to prolong your life.

The Tao of Love and Sex - Book Summary (2024)